Greenleaf's Holidays

Robert Greenleaf's daughter told me that her father missed out on the joy of holiday celebrations when he was a child. No lavish Christmases, no Valentine's Day cards. Even though Bob's father George was a remarkable and admirable man, his mother Burchie was an emotionally unstable alcoholic. That fact, combined with the lack of celebrations, must have made holiday periods bittersweet.

Instead of dwelling on all he had missed growing up, the adult Robert Greenleaf went all-out to celebrate the holidays. He spent weeks in his basement workshop fashioning gifts of jewelry for his wife and daughters and putting together gadgets for his son. The Greenleaf Christmas tree was decorated in splendid and outrageous fashion, planted in an ocean of bought and homemade gifts. On Valentine's Day, Bob festooned the house with crepe paper, cooked breakfast for "my women" and passed out presents.

In doing all these things Bob not only showed love for his family but also served them—and himself—by creating new and more positive holiday associations instead of brooding on or reproducing the past. This celebratory side of Greenleaf is little-known but for me it holds lessons as powerful as his writings: just as I must choose to lead, I must also choose to create and accept joy that is deeper than surface happiness; I cannot change the past but I can change my responses to it and create a rich present; serving oneself as well as others is psychologically smart.

It's something to think about this Christmas.

Don Frick